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Life in Bluffdale

Week two

Well we have been in Bluffdale two weeks now and I guess its about time I let me fans (I use the term loosely) know that I am alive and well.  It has been a bit crazy trying to settle into a good routine for the family but I think we are just about there.  I am grateful the kids got into the local charter school but man…I broke my budget this month.  Completely annihilated it.  Uniforms for 6 rugrats and school supplies to boot…I’m ready to just hide until October.

A Typical Day

Although nothing for me is typical, here is what a typical/ideal day looks like.  We wake up at 6:30 and spend the next hour … getting dressed, changing diapers, eating breakfast, brushing hair/teeth, doing dishes, family prayer, individual scripture reading.  Whew…did we get it all?

The older kids head to school while the younger 3 and I do chores, stories, and play time.  This is the time for me and the three boys.  Jax is having a hard time getting me to slow down and enjoy life.  I see too many projects all around me, too many things that need to be cleaned, organized, finished, etc.  I need to improve these 3 hours and focus on the needs of the ones at my feet.

Lunchtime comes all too soon and Andrew heads to school.  The 2 boys left at home take their naps while mom gets to do some serious work.  I’ve got 3 hours to tackle any project I choose.  But don’t get too involved because from 3-4:30 it’s a rat race trying to pickup kids from 3 different campuses (thankfully all here in Bluffdale) while getting two of them to and from cross country practice.

Let me tell you, ironing out the wrinkles in our pick-up routine was rough.  The first day, Caitlin waited for over an hour at the high school, because I had to pick up Kristie and get her to the Jr High and I was sure it would be faster than the shuttle.  The next day we tried the shuttle, but that meant the little kids waited 30+ minutes for Caitlin and we still had to head over to the Jr High.  It took some playing around but I think we are finally all satisfied with the pickup routine.

Evenings are nice, dinner, more playing together and enjoying family time.  The kids are always wanting to play with friends but I’ve missed them all day and I don’t like to share much.

Reality

Alright, so I mentioned that was an ideal routine.  In reality there have been a lot more projects to make this move comfortable.  I have made endless trips to the store for clothes, school supplies, groceries, etc.  (And I mean endless both in the quantity and length.  Truly it is ridiculous.)  There have been multiple trips to PG to get beds, furniture, food, etc.  It took me an entire day to set up bunk beds, the daybed, and the crib.  Not to mention having to run to the store for a new bolt for the trundle bed.  Jax and I spent an entire day cleaning up the driveway area to make room to park.  I had to re-caulk the bathtub before bath night.  We blew in the insulation at night but painted the whole addition in a 24 hour period.

Thankfully the library isn’t too far away (Riverton – Why doesn’t Bluffdale have one?) because I think I have been there 10 times in the last 2 weeks.  I am extremely grateful that we have internet up and running here now and I really feel that things can simmer down from this rolling boil to a gentle rhythm.  I still can’t sit still, I am going crazy sitting at the computer instead of wiring outlets.  But things improve each and every day.

I choose to enjoy this adventure called life…It’s a journey worth taking.

Jensen Family minus Jax (taking the pic)
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An Exhausting Week

Life is exhausting.

Nothing out of the ordinary this week, just life being life.  But I’m beat!

We do have internet now at my parents place, so that’s good.  We now have access to the outside world.

The kids are all in school and doing fine.  We are getting into the swing of things here and are making adjustments to make things easier.

We still only have one shower for the 12 people living here.  That will be a construction priority as soon as we find time to do some construction again.

After the kids left for school, Julie and I worked today on the parking situation.  We got the pile of green waste picked up off of the driveway, moved the swamp cooler, pulled the tractor out into the field, moved a pile of pallets, moved 2 boats away, loaded up a trailer full of trash, and swept the entire parking area.  5 hours of work later and we can now park by the garages again!  Hopefully the motorhome will be moved soon to make it even easier.

I’m toying with the idea that Julie is a futuristic cyborg with a limitless energy supply.   That woman never stops and I don’t feel like I get to either.   She can go forever, but I desperately need some down time!  Life is exhausting!

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Changing Schools – Again!

One of my favorite persons that I’ve met since coming back to Utah has got to be Les Hamilton.  We were in the same ward for a few months before a split, and have only talked a dozen or so times.   But every time I talk to him I like him even more than before.  He happens to be the AD at Summit Academy High School.

Good To Know

A few weeks ago I wrote about how we had gotten the kids all ready for school.  Well, last week Les shared a post on Facebook that Summit Academy High School was still accepting applications.   I had known that Summit was the closest school to my parents house, but I thought there was no way we could afford it.

When Les shared his post, I contacted him and told him I would like to consider it but that I was worried about cost since I’m a disabled vet who just lost everything.

Turns out I’m an idiot (no shock to the rest of you, I know).   Summit isn’t a private school…  it is a charter school.   No tuition!!  There is no reason my kids couldn’t attend.

Changing Again!

So I got online ASAP and put in applications for all of my kiddos.  They had room for all of them but Andrew, the one going into kindergarten.  They were reasonable enough to tell me that if I registered the others that they would “make room” for him.

So now the kids are all changing schools again.   It’s been a pain in the “lower torso” to take care of the withdrawals, fees, new schedules, and uniforms.   But I think the change will be a good one.   My kids are now attending Summit Academy schools in Bluffdale.

First Day

And this morning, despite the headaches and current life turmoil, we were able to successfully get the children off to school.  I think they were all even wearing clean clothes!

Nikki was nervous about the new school.  She really thrived at Central Elementary in PG.  She’s a bright little girl and I’m sure she’ll thrive here too.   Josh wasn’t interested in classes but more excited about Cross Country and Volleyball that both start after school today.

Caitlin just wants to find people she knows.  Kris and Charlee and excited to find friends too.  They all are looking forward to a great school year!

And so are we!!

Funny side note.   I called and withdrew the kids from the public schools.  The people who answered were all nice and polite and said it was no problem.

They all said they needed to note where the kids would be attending.  When I told them Summit, they ALL became much less polite, and borderline rude.   One of them asked the new school, and when I replied with “Summit Academy” I got back, “Summit?!  OK, got it” and she hung up on me.

I know there is political tension between public school advocates and advocates of other options.  But this was my first taste of it on a personal level.  I was a bit surprised at first.

I understand that public schools don’t want to lose the money that comes with each kid, but apparently they don’t understand that they are also losing the COST of the kid and the needed effort/energy to care for him/her.   But since they (and almost everyone else) focus on money…

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Death and Divorce: Viable Options

When I was a Realtor I always considered it my primary task to remove as much stress from my clients as I possibly could.  Why?  Because studies showed that moving created stress near the levels of having a loved one die, or going through a divorce.

I think Julie would have happily taken either of those options yesterday.  Instead, she got to move into her “In-Laws” house (cue creepy horror music).

Stressed Out

It was not nearly as hard for her to move into her parents house.  It was a house she was familiar with, it was her parents instead of mine, and mostly because she knew it was a temporary home.

This time things are different.  This time the house is new to her.  She hasn’t lived here before, she doesn’t have a history of where things have been located in the house, she doesn’t have childhood memories there, there isn’t as much finished space, and other such reasons make this much harder emotionally for her.

And the owners of the house are new.  The household ‘norms’ are different.  She is trying to be more cautious about ‘stepping on toes’ since she hasn’t lived with my parents before.  She’s feeling very self-conscious about changing the way things have been done before, in a house she doesn’t feel is “hers” yet.  She doesn’t want to hurt feelings and has to think about more than she did while living with her parents.

And this is a permanent move.  Rather than going to her parents just temporarily and knowing she’ll get out of there again, she knows this move is not. That she won’t be leaving here anytime soon.   That is hard.  This isn’t where we ‘want’ to be.  If we had a magic wand to wave and choose where to live, it wouldn’t be here.   We’re here because of circumstances; not because it is our lifelong dream to move in with my parents (Sorry Mom).

The knowledge that this is a permanent (or at least very long term) is stressful, especially for Julie.  It’s not easy on me, but I feel really terribly bad for my sweetheart.

“It’s Fine”

We have a running joke where when we aren’t really happy about something we just tell each other “It’s fine! It’s fine!” with a  certain emphasis that tells the other that we’re jokingly not thrilled.   Julie keeps telling me that “It’s fine’ but without that emphasis.

She says it’s fine, but she is lying.  I caught her crying yesterday while trying to move in.  The stress of trying to organize ourselves into a house with people already living in it was winning the day.   I held her and told her things would get better.  That little by little it will feel more like home, and that she is welcome to make it her home.

And today is a better day.  She is more carefree and happy.  It’s will be a roller coaster of ups and downs, but I’m sure it will trend toward happiness.

She really will be fine.  She is amazingly strong and resilient.  And she’s been through worse.   Afterall, she did move me into an unfinished home, in December, with no insulation, no internal plumbing, no walls, no electricity, and no flooring (concrete and plywood was all), and she considers it a great memory.

We’ll be fine and things will work out.  Hopefully without the Death and Divorce involved.

But if you see Julie, and feel inclined, please pass on your encouragement and love.   She might need them more than usual over the next few weeks.

And please forgive her if I’m wrong and she strangles me in my sleep.  Even I would understand!   🙂